A COVID St. Patrick’s Day… Take 2 

Grace Koch, Staff Reporter

We’ve already been through St. Patrick’s Day during quarantine. Hopefully, we made this one better than the first time around (especially now that there isn’t a toilet paper shortage). 

Instead of focusing on what we can’t do, I hope we continued to focus on what we can do. Thankfully, we can still drink our Shamrock shakes from McDonalds and (hopefully) watch the Chicago River run green. We can still go to school and eat Sage cookies. 

As teenagers, there are also some things high school student’s can’t do. We can’t go to an Irish pub and drink our weight in whiskey. We can’t take the day off to swim in the green Chicago River, and we can’t get a tattoo of a four-leaf clover. 

I suppose we could bake green potato muffins or eat green eggs and ham for breakfast. As my mother would love to point out, there are also plenty of green vegetables that can get you into the St. Patty’s Day spirit! Maggie Shelton shared how her family celebrated this holiday: “In light of COVID this year, my family will be buying Irish food and eating it at home to celebrate. I also think Archmere should have a green tag-day to honor this holiday!”

Then there’s the topic of leprechauns. These 3-foot tall magical creatures are known worldwide for their mischievous antics. If you felt so inclined, perhaps you set a trap for these creatures, using lucky charms as bait. Or better yet, you ate the lucky charms yourself (yum!). If you really love this holiday and worried that mischievous leprechauns wouldn’t show up, I have an idea. You ccould always dress your 5 year-old brother in green, give him some food dye, and tell him to go wild (just don’t tell anyone you heard it from me). 

Above is an image of the Chicago River on St. Patrick’s Day. Originally, after dumping in one hundred gallons of vegetable dye, the Chicago River ran green for a week. Now, the Plumbers Union dumps in only 40 gallons annually for environmental safety.

I know it’s hard, having had a year of COVID, but we’ve learned to adapt. Let’s make these holidays better and safer than ever before. Happy Saint Patrick’s Day, folks. I hope a tiny masked leprechaun managed to break into your house and dye your toilet green, as long as he sanitized your bathroom afterwards.